Dear readers,
While reading thru some articles on sexual abuse,i came across this useful information and would to share it with you all.
The information below is basically related to children who have been sexually abused.
If at all any of the signs or symptoms present in your child's behaviour,please be more attentive and make a further move towards identifying your child's problem.
The information below is basically related to children who have been sexually abused.
If at all any of the signs or symptoms present in your child's behaviour,please be more attentive and make a further move towards identifying your child's problem.
Hopefully we can protect more kids from getting abused and we shall create a secured environment for their childhood.
Forgetting Childhood Rape/Abuse
It is not rare for people to say they don't remember an abuse experience that actually happened.
It is not rare for people to report that there were times when they didn't remember an abuse experience that they remember now.
When people say these things, we try to describe and explain what they are reporting with psychological constructs:
"forgetting"
"amnesia"
"repression"
"dissociation"
"amnesia"
"repression"
"dissociation"
Three crucial points:
1. "Amnesia" is a descriptive construct. It directs our attention to the condition of being unable to remember experiences like childhood sexual abuse.
2. "Repression" and "dissociation" are explanatory constructs. They point to hypothesized psychological mechanisms that may be responsible for the condition of amnesia.
3. All constructs exist on a continuum from descriptive to explanatory. When it comes to empirical evidence of traumatic and recovered memories, dissociation is more descriptive of more empirical evidence than is repression.
It is not rare for people to say that at some point they came to remember a past abuse experience which they had not previously remembered.
Signs of Sexual Abuse
Because most children cannot or do not tell about being sexually abused, it is up to concerned adults to recognize signs of abuse. Physical evidence of abuse is rare. Therefore, we must look for behavior signs. Unfortunately, there is no one behavior alone that definitely determines a child has been sexually abused.
The following are general behavior changes that may occur in children who have been sexually abused:
Physical complaints:
- Fear or dislike of certain people or places
- Sleep disturbances
- Headaches/Migraines (nausea)
- School problems
- Withdrawal from family, friends, or usual activities
- Excessive bathing or poor hygiene
- Return to younger, more babyish behavior
- Depression
- Anxiety (social anxiety)
- Discipline problems
- Running away
- Eating disorders
- Passive or overly pleasing behavior
- Delinquent acts
- Low self-esteem
- Self-destructive behavior
- Hostility or aggression
- Drug or alcohol problems
- Sexual activity or pregnancy at an early age
- Suicide attempts
- Additional Symptoms
- Copying adult sexual behavior
- Persistent sexual play with other children, themselves, toys or pets
- Displaying sexual knowledge, through language or behavior, that is beyond what is normal for their age
- Unexplained pain, swelling, bleeding or irritation of the mouth, genital or anal area; urinary infections; sexually transmitted diseases
- Hints, indirect comments or statements about the abuse
The Silent Problem
Often children do not tell anyone about sexual abuse because they:
- are too young to put what has happened into words
- were threatened or bribed by the abuser to keep the abuse a secret
- feel confused by the attention and feelings accompanying the abuse
- are afraid no one will believe them
- blame themselves or believe the abuse is punishment for being "bad"
- feel too ashamed or embarrassed to tell
- worry about getting into trouble or getting a loved one into trouble
Silence enables sexual abuse to continue. Silence protects sexual offenders and hurts children who are being abused. Sexual abuse is an extremely difficult and damaging experience. Today there are many resources to help victims and their families. Children no longer need to suffer in silence.
Feelings
Children who have been sexually abused feel many different (and often overwhelming) emotions, including:
Fear...
of the abuser
of causing trouble
of losing adults important to them
of being taken away from home
of being "different"
Anger...
at the abuser
at other adults around them who did not protect them
at themselves (feeling as if they caused trouble)
Isolation...
because "something is wrong with me"
because they feel alone in their experience
because they have trouble talking about the abuse
Sadness...
about having something taken from them
about losing a part of themselves
about growing up too fast
about being betrayed by someone they trusted
Guilt...
for not being able to stop the abuse
for believing they "consented" to the abuse
for "telling"--if they told
for keeping the secret--if they did not tell
Shame...
about being involved in the experience
about their bodies' response to the abuse
Confusion...
because they may still love the abuser
because their feelings change all the time
Protecting Children,
As concerned adults, we want to protect children from sexual abuse, but we can't always be there to do that. We can, however, teach children about sexual abuse in order to increase their awareness and coping skills. Without frightening children, we can provide them with appropriate safety information and support at every stage of their development.
We can provide personal safety information to children in a matter- of-fact way, with other routine safety discussions about fire, water, health, etc. Although even the best educated child cannot always avoid sexual abuse, children who are well prepared will be more likely to tell you if abuse has occurred. This is a child's best defense. In order to protect children, teach them:
- to feel good about themselves and know they are loved, valued and deserve to be safe
- the difference between safe and unsafe touches
- the proper names for all body parts, so they will be able to communicate clearly
- that safety rules apply to all adults, not just strangers
- that their bodies belong to them and nobody has the right to touch them or hurt them
- that they can say "no" to requests that make them feel uncomfortable--even from a close relative or family friend
- to report to you if any adult asks them to keep a secret
- that some adults have problems
- that they can rely on you to believe and protect them if they tell you about abuse
- that they are not bad or to blame for sexual abuse
- to tell a trusted adult about abuse even if they are afraid of what may happen
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